Friendship...

[Texas Yellow Fever]

This is old, but funny...Hell the reason it's funny is because it's true!

Friendship

Are you tired of those sissy-ass "friendship" poems that always sound good, but never actually come close to reality? Well, here is a series of promises that actually speak of true friendship:

1. When you are sad -- I will help you get drunk and
plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad.

2. When you are blue -- I will try to dislodge whatever
is choking you.

3. When you smile -- I will know you finally got laid.

4 When you are scared -- I will try to calm your nerves,
unless it is something silly then I will rag on you about it every chance I get.

5. When you are worried -- I will tell you horrible
stories about how much worse it could be until you quit whining.

6 When you are confused I will use little words.

7. When you are sick -- Stay the hell away from me
until you are well again. I don't want whatever you have.

8. When you fall -- I will point and laugh at your
clumsy ass, but then I will help you get up.

9. This is my oath..... I pledge it to the end. "Why?"
you may ask; "because you are my friend".

Send this to 10 of your closest friends, then get
depressed because you can only think of 4.

Remember.......A good friend will help you move.....a
REALLY good friend will help you move a body.......let me know if you ever need me to bring a shovel.

Friendship is like peeing your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth

 

[JTS VENOM PERFORMANCE]

When I am done--you can have the sloppy seconds

If she is over 130lbs- I will let you go first

If you are really drunk _ I will not piss on your shoes

If there is only 2 beers left- I promise to give one to the drunkest girl, so hopefully we can both get laid:dancing:

 

[Texas Yellow Fever]

Good additions Stinker! LMAO!

 

[Venom Power]

Quoting Steve Holden: "Friendship is like peeing your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth"

While sitting here in my pee'd pants I figured I'd take a more suttle approach to this friendship thing. I might sound ghey but I blame that on the Sickness.

Too many people put off something that brings them joy just because they haven't thought about it, don't have it on their schedule, didn't know it was coming or are too rigid to depart from their routine.

I got to thinking one day about all those people on the Titanic who passed up dessert at dinner that fateful night in an effort to cut back. From then on, I've tried to be a little more flexible.

How many women out there will eat at home because their husband didn't suggest going out to dinner until after something had been thawed? Does the word "refrigeration" mean nothing to you?

How often have your kids dropped in to talk and sat in silence while you watched 'Jeopardy' on television?

I cannot count the times I called my grandmother and said, "How about going to lunch in a half hour?" She would gas up and stammer, "I can't. I have clothes on the line. My hair is dirty. I wish I had known yesterday, I had a late breakfast, It looks like rain." And my personal favorite: "It's Monday." .She died a few years ago. We never did have lunch together.

Because we cram so much into their lives, we tend to schedule our headaches.. We live on a sparse diet of promises we make to ourselves when all the conditions are perfect!

"We'll go back and visit the grandparents when we get the little one toilet-trained." "We'll entertain when we replace the living-room carpet. We'll go on a second honeymoon when we get two more kids out of college."

Life has a way of accelerating as we get older. The days get shorter, and the list of promises to ourselves gets longer. One morning, we awaken, and all we have to show for our lives is a litany of "I'm going to," "I plan on," and "Someday, when things are settled down a bit."

When anyone calls my 'seize the moment' friend, she is open to adventure and available for trips. She keeps an open mind on new ideas. Her enthusiasm for life is contagious. You talk with her for five minutes, and you're ready to trade your bad feet for a pair of Roller blades and skip an elevator for a bungee cord.

My lips have not touched ice cream in 6 months. I love ice cream. It's just that I might as well apply it directly to my stomach with a spatula and eliminate the digestive process. The other day, I stopped the truck and bought a triple-decker. If the SRT-10 had hit an iceberg on the way home, I would have died happy.

Now...go on and have a nice day. Do something you WANT to......not something on your SHOULD DO list. If you were going to die soon and had only one phone call you could make, who would you call and what would you say? And why are you waiting?

Make sure you read this to the end; you will understand why I am writing it.

Have you ever watched kids playing on a merry go round or listened to the rain lapping on the ground? Ever followed a butterfly's erratic flight or gazed at the sun into the fading night? Do you run through each day on the fly? When you ask "How are you?" Do you hear the reply?

When the day is done, do you lie in your bed with the next hundred chores running through your head? Ever told your child, "We'll do it tomorrow." And in your haste, not see his/her sorrow? Ever lost touch? Let a good friendship die? Just call to say "Hi"?

When you worry and hurry through your day, it is like an unopened gift....Thrown away.... Life is not a race. Take it slower. Hear the music before the song is over.


It's National Friendship and FAMILY WEEK Show your friends how much you care. That is all, my VTCOA Friends.

 

[TheSickness]

Quoting Steve Holden: "Friendship is like peeing your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth"

While sitting here in my pee'd pants I figured I'd take a more suttle approach to this friendship thing. I might sound ghey but I blame that on the Sickness.

Too many people put off something that brings them joy just because they haven't thought about it, don't have it on their schedule, didn't know it was coming or are too rigid to depart from their routine.

I got to thinking one day about all those people on the Titanic who passed up dessert at dinner that fateful night in an effort to cut back. From then on, I've tried to be a little more flexible.

How many women out there will eat at home because their husband didn't suggest going out to dinner until after something had been thawed? Does the word "refrigeration" mean nothing to you?

How often have your kids dropped in to talk and sat in silence while you watched 'Jeopardy' on television?

I cannot count the times I called my grandmother and said, "How about going to lunch in a half hour?" She would gas up and stammer, "I can't. I have clothes on the line. My hair is dirty. I wish I had known yesterday, I had a late breakfast, It looks like rain." And my personal favorite: "It's Monday." .She died a few years ago. We never did have lunch together.

Because we cram so much into their lives, we tend to schedule our headaches.. We live on a sparse diet of promises we make to ourselves when all the conditions are perfect!

"We'll go back and visit the grandparents when we get the little one toilet-trained." "We'll entertain when we replace the living-room carpet. We'll go on a second honeymoon when we get two more kids out of college."

Life has a way of accelerating as we get older. The days get shorter, and the list of promises to ourselves gets longer. One morning, we awaken, and all we have to show for our lives is a litany of "I'm going to," "I plan on," and "Someday, when things are settled down a bit."

When anyone calls my 'seize the moment' friend, she is open to adventure and available for trips. She keeps an open mind on new ideas. Her enthusiasm for life is contagious. You talk with her for five minutes, and you're ready to trade your bad feet for a pair of Roller blades and skip an elevator for a bungee cord.

My lips have not touched ice cream in 6 months. I love ice cream. It's just that I might as well apply it directly to my stomach with a spatula and eliminate the digestive process. The other day, I stopped the truck and bought a triple-decker. If the SRT-10 had hit an iceberg on the way home, I would have died happy.

Now...go on and have a nice day. Do something you WANT to......not something on your SHOULD DO list. If you were going to die soon and had only one phone call you could make, who would you call and what would you say? And why are you waiting?

Make sure you read this to the end; you will understand why I am writing it.

Have you ever watched kids playing on a merry go round or listened to the rain lapping on the ground? Ever followed a butterfly's erratic flight or gazed at the sun into the fading night? Do you run through each day on the fly? When you ask "How are you?" Do you hear the reply?

When the day is done, do you lie in your bed with the next hundred chores running through your head? Ever told your child, "We'll do it tomorrow." And in your haste, not see his/her sorrow? Ever lost touch? Let a good friendship die? Just call to say "Hi"?

When you worry and hurry through your day, it is like an unopened gift....Thrown away.... Life is not a race. Take it slower. Hear the music before the song is over.


It's National Friendship and FAMILY WEEK Show your friends how much you care. That is all, my VTCOA Friends.

Ok WTF did I do now Anthony :dontknow:

 

[Venom Power]

Ok WTF did I do now Anthony :dontknow:

LOL, I'm on a ghey roll now and I'm sure you'll deduce that simply by reading above. :hmpf: You put this in my head...:argh: I gotta do it see!!! :motz: NOWWWW SEEEEE!!!:banghead:

 

[Silverback]

I just go to Rent-A-Friend. $250.00 an hour and I'm set. :star:

 

[FerrariTruck]

I just go to Rent-A-Friend. $250.00 an hour and I'm set. :star:

I like taiwanese massage. $125....I get a shower, massage, and a treat..

 

[JTS VENOM PERFORMANCE]

1-900-bring wood, thaats right guys just bring your own wood and you can have a ball!

We have many nuttswingers to choose from, the old age iron to the new age big bertha head.

Bring wood will definitly blow you away! and dont worry its only 76 easy payments of $19.95 order now and get free shipping