High School Analogies!

ntw0rk

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These are great!!

Analogies and Metaphors Found in High School Essays

* Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that
had its two other sides
gently compressed by a Thigh Master.

* His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and
breaking alliances like
underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.

* He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from
experience, like a guy
who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse
without one of those
boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the
country speaking at high
schools about the dangers of looking at a solar
eclipse without one of those
boxes with a pinhole in it.

* She grew on him like she was a colony of E. coli
and he was
room-temperature Canadian beef.

* She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that
sound a dog makes just
before it throws up.

* Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.

* He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree.

* The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had
disintegrated because of
his wife's infidelity came as a rude shock, like a
surcharge at a formerly
surcharge-free ATM.

*The little boat gently drifted across the pond
exactly the way a bowling
ball wouldn't.

* McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like
a Hefty bag filled with
vegetable soup.

* From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole
scene had an eerie,
surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in
another city and Jeopardy
comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.

* Her hair glistened in the rain like nose hair
after a sneeze.

* The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like
maggots when you fry
them in hot grease.

* Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed
lovers raced across the
grassy field toward each other like two freight
trains, one having left
Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the
ther from Topeka at 4:19
p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.

* They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with
picket fences that
resembled Nancy Kerrigan's teeth.

* John and Mary had never met. They were like two
hummingbirds who had also
never met.

* He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant
and she was the East
River.

* Even in his last years, Grandpappy had a mind like
a steel trap, only one
that had been left out so long, it had rusted shut.

* The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil.
But unlike Phil, this
plan just might work.

* The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you
get from not eating for
a while.

* "Oh, Jason, take me!"; she panted, her breasts
heaving like a college
freshman on $1-a-beer night.

* He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical
lame duck, either, but a
real duck that was actually lame. Maybe from
stepping on a land mine or
something.

* The knife was as sharp as the tone used by Rep.
Sheila Jackson Lee
(D-Tex.) in her first several points of
parliamentary procedure made to Rep.
* Henry Hyde (R-Ill. ) in the House Judiciary
Committee hearings on the
impeachment of President William Jefferson Clinton.

* The ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and
extended one slender leg
behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.

* It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing
kids around with power
tools.

* He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought
he heard bells, as if
she were a garbage truck backing up.

* She was as easy as the TV Guide crossword.

* Her eyes were like limpid pools, only they had
forgotten to put in any pH
cleanser.

* She walked into my office like a centipede with 98
missing legs.

* Her voice had that tense, grating quality, like a
generation thermal paper
fax machine that needed a band tightened.

* It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you
accidentally staple it to the
wall
 
Scooter,

Some of those were hysterical:

* He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant
and she was the East
River.

Was really funny.....

So many of them (were funny) for so many different reasons.....

Great post...

SD
 
LMAO!!!

"* She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that
sound a dog makes just
before it throws up."

Does this remind anyone else of Rita Cosby? :dontknow: :D :puke:
 
Black1 said:
LMAO!!!

"* She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that
sound a dog makes just
before it throws up."

Does this remind anyone else of Rita Cosby? :dontknow: :D :puke:

Amen to that.........;)

SD
 
* McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like
a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.


Now there's a visual for you....:D



Stretch
 
He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from
experience, like a guy
who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse
without one of those
boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the
country speaking at high
schools about the dangers of looking at a solar
eclipse without one of those
boxes with a pinhole in it.



Those were great, when do you get out of high school?
 

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