If men really ran the world

[OCBob]

· Any fake phone number a girl gave you would automatically
forward your call to her real number.

· Nodding and looking at your watch would be deemed an acceptable
response to "I love you."

· Hallmark would make "Sorry, what was your name again" cards.

· When your girlfriend really needed to talk to you during the
game, she'd appear in a little box in the corner of the screen
during a time-out.

· Breaking up would be a lot easier. A smack to the ass and a
"Nice hustle, you'll get 'em next time" would pretty much do it.

· Birth control would come in ale or lager.

· Each year, your raise would be pegged to the fortunes of the
NFL team of your choice.

· The funniest guy in the office would get to be CEO.

· At the end of the workday, a whistle would blow and you'd jump
out your window and slide down the tail of a brontosaurus and
right into your car like Fred Flintstone.

· Lifeguards could remove citizens from beaches for violating the
"public ugliness" ordinance.

· Tanks would be far easier to rent.

· Garbage would take itself out.

· Instead of beer belly, you'd get "beer biceps."

· Instead of an expensive engagement ring, you could present your
wife-to-be with a giant foam hand that said, "You're #1!"

· Valentine's Day would be moved to February 29th so it would
only occur in leap years.

· On Groundhog Day, if you saw your shadow, you'd get the day off
to go drinking. Mother's Day, too.

· St. Patrick's Day, however, would remain exactly the same. But
it would be celebrated every month.

· Cops would be broadcast live, and you could phone in advice to
the pursuing cops. Or to the crooks.

· The victors in any athletic competition would get to kill and
eat the losers.

· The only show opposite Monday Night Football would be Monday
Night Football from a Different Camera Angle.

· It would be perfectly legal to steal a sports car, as long as
you returned it the following day with a full tank of gas.

· Every man would get four real Get Out of Jail Free cards per
year.

· When a cop gave you a ticket, every smart-aleck answer you
responded with would actually reduce your fine. As in: Cop: "You
know how fast you were going" You: "All I know is, I was spilling
my beer all over the place." Cop: "Nice one. That's $10 off."

· People would never talk about how fresh they felt.

· Telephones would automatically cut off after 30 seconds of
conversation.

 

[Begood]

Sounds good to me Bob, where do I sign up?

Bill.

 

[Silverback]

·
· Lifeguards could remove citizens from beaches for violating the
"public ugliness" ordinance.

Damn, now I can't go to the beach.

 

[Black1]

· ....
· Hallmark would make "Sorry, what was your name again" cards.

Actually, the Hallmark factory would be burnt to the ground, and all the executives would be drawn and quartered.... for ALL of those goofy "Hallmark Holidays".... Actually, just for "Sweetest Day", the penalty would be death by rabid lions. :rock:

· When a cop gave you a ticket, every smart-aleck answer you
responded with would actually reduce your fine. As in: Cop: "You
know how fast you were going" You: "All I know is, I was spilling
my beer all over the place." Cop: "Nice one. That's $10 off."

Now THAT'S some funny shit right there! LMAO!!!

 

[Wifey]

Actually, the Hallmark factory would be burnt to the ground, and all the executives would be drawn and quartered.... for ALL of those goofy "Hallmark Holidays".... Actually, just for "Sweetest Day", the penalty would be death by rabid lions. :rock:



Now THAT'S some funny shit right there! LMAO!!!

Like this one ............ :dontknow:

NEVER MIND THE LINK DIDN'T WORK


:star: :dancing:

 

[TheMoparConnection]

men lets run the world

 

[v8eater]

· The victors in any athletic competition would get to kill and
eat the losers.

Been there... Done that...:evil:

 

[Silverback]

Been there... Done that...:evil:

Taste like Chicken did they?:dontknow: